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The Top 10 Movie and Television Crushes (Real and Fictional) for Lady Geeks



Let's face it, we all get crushes on people from film and television sometimes, whether we're married or single.

Who you find appealing may say a lot about you or something you may be lacking in your personal life at the moment. Yes, I'm saying I think you should psychologically delve into this kind of stuff.

I'm thinking about it, because it seems like I'm always in a conversation with a fellow lady geek about who she finds appealing in a film and why, and usually her obsession of the moment seems a strange mystery to her that can't be solved. (One recent such conversation? A friend with a serious fixation on Sirius Black. You know who you are...)

Analyzing these crushes can help you figure out what you may want in a partner someday or what you may need more of in your life right now. If you find yourself interested in any of these geek icons on any level, permanently or during a phase, you probably like intelligent men, funny men, sensitive men or men who find themselves passionate about a cause.

Then again, it may indicate that you prefer a rebel, an outsider, or a man who doesn't worry about keeping up with contemporary culture or the popular opinion. Maybe you're just bored and longing for adventure.

Whatever it is, feel proud. Of all the men in all the gin joints in all the world, you will most likely find yourself highly compatible with a geek...and that's nothing to be ashamed of...read on and discover what your geek crush might say about you.

(By the way, not only does my husband know that I wrote this article, he proofread it...)



1. Bruce Campbell - Evil Dead, Burn Notice, Brisco County Jr., If Chins Could Kill, The Entire Convention Scene, etc.

Bruce is one of the guys on this list that earns his spot via his real life identity. He's a cult icon on the geek scene, well known for playing the masculine caricature Ash in the Evil Dead movies.

But it's his kindness to fans, his excellent comedic timing, and his clever books that win our hearts time and time again. If his memoirs are accurate, he's actually the precise opposite of Ash, He's a serial monogamist with all the self-conscious hang-ups of your average Joe. Which creates some subliminal appeal at a subconscious level, making him both the ultimate figure of red-blooded masculinity while also being a sensitive tongue-in-cheek parody of the very idea.

Bruce is the best of both worlds. A man who could rescue us from a horde of deadites, but who could also have an all-night conversation about comics and movies.


2. Xander - "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" - Xander was the guy permanently stuck in Buffy's "friend zone". He was the reject every geeky little loner girl in high school (when the show was airing) would've gladly dated. (*cough cough*)

He was smart, funny and even though nobody else on the show seemed to notice, as happens so often in film and television, he was criminally handsome.

The true appeal, however, always comes in characters that are outcasts. The self-sabotaging loner resonates in every language and every country. In an early little twist on gender roles, his appeal may have had everything to do with us wanting to rescue him.


3. Spock - "Star Trek" TOS - I recently read Leonard Nimoy's second memoir, "I Am Spock", in which Nimoy cleared up a lot of confusion for me. When I was a kid, my mother was desperately in love with Spock (and Riker), having a framed picture of him sitting in the kitchen on top of a file cabinet at all times. My sisters and I never understood that, until the most recent Trek movie came out last summer. I always loved Spock, especially in Voyage Home, but I didn't get the sex appeal angle. This time, I totally did. Spock is intelligent, a Vulcan with discerning taste, which would mean that he's entirely unmoved by bimbos. He would need a smart woman, oh say, a geek woman. That's where we come in. Apparently, Nimoy says in his book, Spock was a huge sex symbol back when the original Trek was airing, mobbed frequently by hordes of alien-crazed young women. He chalks it up to the fact that women love a smart man who stands apart from trends and plays hard to get. I guess he, and my mother, were right after all. If you find yourself interested in the idea of Spock, you may be looking to catch someone's attention or take up the challenge of unrequited love. A concept that's always romantic and appealing in film and television, but one that usually leads to heartbreak in reality. Perhaps an analyst would tell you that you're self-sabotaging yourself, choosing emotionally unavailable men because of self-esteem issues. Or maybe you just really like pointy ears and dark hair. Either way...


4. Nathan Fillion - "Firefly", "Castle", Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog - Fillion is still in his early days of being a geek heartthrob, but he has all of the qualities that will set geek girls' hearts aflame. He plays quirky characters, he has a great sense of humor, he's fun at comic conventions, and he was in a TV series with a cult following, the all too short-lived Joss Whedon sci-fi western, "Firefly". Maybe Whedon just knows how to write appealing male characters with just that perfect mix of spirit and ennui, strength and sensitivity. Whatever the case, Fillion's willingness to humiliate himself for a laugh and his Han Solo-esque appeal may indicate that you're looking for a hands-off flirtation vs. a serious relationship at the moment. Almost all of his roles involve him playing opposite a "will they or won't they get together" love interest. (Minus his stint as one seriously bad evil preacher on, "Buffy", of course.)


5. Dr. "Indiana" Jones - He researches, he teaches, and he adventures. What's not to love? There's something about the idea of a healthy balance between brains and brawn, and Indiana Jones is the perfect example of that balance. Every woman wants a man who will challenge her, not be intimidated by her, and perhaps at times surprise her by whisking her away on an adventure...just maybe not the kind that gets you dangled over a pit of boiling hot lava. If you find yourself attracted to Dr. Jones, it may be as simple as searching for an academic who likes outdoor sports or adventure vacations. Or you may be longing for an older or more mature man who can handle the fact that you, as a woman/human being, are going to have a complex array of emotions and feelings. After all, Indy rolls with the punches (literally) when the going gets tough with Marion, Willie, and even that duplicitous Nazi sympathizing dame from, "The Last Crusade". So perhaps you're looking for a challenging but stabilizing partner. Or you could just hold out for Harrison Ford. But I'm pretty sure he's taken...and almost seventy. Tough to start a life with at that stage...


6. Sherlock Holmes - Sure, he's a little cold. But he's smart. Very smart. Holmes is the ultimate example of a man whose head can't be turned by just any pretty face or figure, which presents an enticing challenge in getting his attention. He's the kind of man that would need a woman to match him, an equal. So if you like the idea of having your very own Sherlock Holmes, you're probably independent and smart. But you better also be patient and wary. Holmes was obsessive and unhealthy (He was, in fact, a cocaine addict and at times, a shut-in, the ultimate literary bad boy)...there was only ever one woman who caught his interest. And she did so by outsmarting him at his own game, after which he never pursued her again. (In all fairness, she was married.) The danger in a Holmes-like figure is also what makes him appealing, his aloof loner status. In reality, women who are attracted to men like Holmes may get far more than they bargain for, finding themselves doing all the work in a thankless relationship. Though he's certainly crush-worthy...remember, in reality, if a man really likes you, he should pursue you back and eventually drop his cold outer layer, even if only in the privacy of your relationship.


7. Jareth - "Labyrinth" - Yes, we know. If you're reading this and you're male, then you don't like Jareth. His pants made you uncomfortable. We get it. But young geek girls barely flinched, hardly noticed. I never did until his striking wardrobe that left little to the imagination was pointed out to me by male friends in later years. (In fact, try this as a party game, take bets with your girlfriends on how many seconds it will take for someone to mention Bowie's cod piece after you say the word, "Labyrinth".) His wardrobe was nothing that isn't worn in any ballet in the world. That we didn't so much care about.

What you did care about if you watched this as a little girl, like I did, was the idea of the king of some far off land relieving you of babysitting duties and taking you dancing to a dreamy masquerade. Much like Holmes, he's got some negative qualities. But what he represents is passion and obsession. Real love, after all, (as my husband says) is just permanent obsession. But it's much healthier than Jareth's was for Sarah. Ultimately though, the idea of Jareth is what makes women sigh. An eccentric and confident man who will pull out all the stops, and stop at nothing, to get your attention. But he's also a feminist at heart, unwilling (or unable, it's still unclear) to force Sarah into loving him. Though he certainly does try...actually, the more I think about it, the more as a feminist I should probably hate Jareth and his manipulative ways...but darn if there isn't something viscerally attractive about his endless pursuit of his age-inappropriate lady love, a feisty and strong young woman (with eyebrows for days). *sigh* If you're crushing on Jareth, you may be lacking romance and those giddy feelings of first-love and passion. Or maybe you just like a guy who wears eyeliner. Again, like with Spock, either way...


8. Rivers Cuomo - Weezer - He's the lead singer that made guys with glasses cool again. His pining voice and candid lyrics about love and loss make a strong argument for the sensitive male. Cuomo reminds us that men suffer for love too, and when we're listening to the album Pinkerton, we're not so secretly hoping that we could someday inspire such complex emotions in the man we love. On top of all that, the man makes excellent music. Plain and simple. If you find Rivers Cuomo appealing, look for a man that isn't afraid to communicate. But make sure it doesn't backfire on you, sensitive men can also have a hard time making decisions and may often read more into normal relationship problems and milestones than they should. Be prepared to have to bring him back down to Earth every once in a while by cracking a joke.


9. Egon Spengler - "Ghostbusters" - He had a slinky once...but he straightened it.  I think Egon may have been one of my first crushes ever. There was something about his quiet demeanor that suggested an almost dual personality. He couldn't have been all square all the time, right? Which meant you wanted to be the girl to get to see him with his guard down. And again, there's something appealing about the idea of an intellectual man finding you attractive. The more I look over this list, the more I realize it's about inspiration. We hope to be able to someday land the smart guy, the dignified guy. Ultimately, it may even be a selfish sub-conscious thing...if a man who is smarter than everyone else you know finds you intriguing...then you must be something special, eh? There was something about Egon that made him seem so above it all without being snobby. His appeal is mysterious, but all I knew was that when I was five and playing "wedding" with my dress up veil, Egon was always the one standing at the end of the aisle.


10. Fox Mulder - "The X Files" - Mulder is funny and single-minded. He's living for a cause. You can almost imagine that if he wasn't with the FBI, he'd be out saving whales or feeding the poor. He's one of the good guys, not easily intimidated by "the man". And he can wait. The show writers wrote great chemistry between Mulder and Scully, but it was a long slow burn. He never pushed or whined at Scully to love him, he never issued an ultimatum, he waited her out, using charm and tenacity to wear her down.

 Mulder, like a lot of the men on this list, may have been appealing for the simple fact that he was attracted to a strong woman. Same thing with Xander and Holmes and Jareth and Indiana Jones...a man who likes a strong woman is far more appealing than your average reality show hunk who blabbers on about strippers and beer.

If men are always picking up magazines with lists of "hot" women because they're making that "come hither" face in those glossy photos, then maybe this list of probable geek crushes for women is just a different version of the same thing. If you're a strong woman, you want a man who will be interested in that strength, wherever it may lie. In your opinions, in your interests, or in your convictions and beliefs. Jake and I got into a long conversation in the car the other day about some of the great romances of geek culture, Han and Leia in specific. Think about that couple and many of the couples from this list, (Mulder and Scully, Indy and Marion) they almost all feature fighting and conflict. I find Han and Leia's relationship far more romantic than anything you would ever see on, "The Bachelor" or in a romance novel. Specifically because it wasn't easy.

 Don't ever feel weird about having a crush on a fictional character or an actor. (I mean, do feel weird if you're actually being weird. Stalking...not cool.) But if you figure out why you like what you like, you're one step closer to finding love (or whatever you're lacking) in reality. As geeks, our interests and obsessions can actually become ways to decode our psychological issues.

Another finalist who didn't quite make the cut? Chandler Bing from "Friends". Who was your geek crush and why?

4 comments:

  1. My mom was in love with Spock, too. And later, C3PO. Still trying to work that one out.

    I'm totally there with you and Harold Ramis/Egon. I even thought he was cute in the cartoon Ghostbusters.

    But what about HP himself or Ron Weasley? I keep convincing myself it'd the character of HP and not Daniel Radcliffe that I like, as he's more than a tad too young for me. But honestly, my REAL geek crush from HP is Severus Snape/Alan Rickman.

    Some of my other geek guys who didn't make your list: Buckaroo Banzai (Peter Weller) and the kid that Emilio Estevez played in Repo Man. Brendan Frazer and the man who played the Mummy in the first Mummy movie. Huge crushes at the time I saw those movies. And most of the male cast from LOST, but especially McGuyver-like Sayid.

    I think sometimes having a crush on a fictional character or the actor that plays him is not so much a comment on what you, your life might be missing, but it is that these characters are an idealized version of male characteristics. They plug into your (my) love of fantasy. Plus, a lot of these guys are damn cute. : )

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  2. Hooray for Sirius!

    My latest guilty pleasure is multiple viewings of Ironman. Let's hear it for Tony Stark! In real life I'd have no tolerance at all for the man, but onscreen I can't get enough. "Never before has a better metaphor of the phoenix been personified!" Ironically, as a child of the 80's I wasn't impressed much by Robert Downey Jr., but I guess he's like Sean Connery...improves with age.
    I give him two flight stabilizers up!

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  3. I was sooo in love with Chandler Bing (Matthew Perry). He was a little bit handsome and really, really funny. Indiana Jones and Fox Mulder would be on my list too. Does Michael J. Fox count?

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  4. I will always and forever wish for Jareth.

    Even now that I'm a serious relationship and take a lot more notice to Jareth's habit of constantly picking his nose on-screen, I still swoon over him whenever I watch the movie.

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